Category Archives: GENERAL

Celebrity Wine Is Truly The Pitts

Posted on February 18, 2013 by intoxreport

Truth be told, my Intoxicology Report editors don’t like me—not one little bit.  They don’t like my literary style, my superiority complex or my cute Lucy Ball poodle do—in short, they don’t like the cut of my jib.  They are … Continue reading →

Posted in GENERAL, Provence | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

Spa Vs. Spa

Posted on February 15, 2013 by intoxreport

Did you know that ‘spa’ is an acronym for  ‘self-indulgent pretentious ass-wipe’? If you didn’t, you should read this column more often, because that’s the kind of arcane crap you are always learning around here. Anyway, if the word ‘spa’ … Continue reading →

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Obama/French Force One More Wine/Whine Pun

Posted on January 15, 2013 by intoxreport

What’s wrong with the French anyway?  They cling to the word ‘Champagne’  like Jimmy Stewart clung to that red-tile rooftop in the beginning of Vertigo. Well, of course, that question is purely rhetorical.  I’ll tell you what’s wrong with the … Continue reading →

Posted in CALIFORNIA, GENERAL | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

‘Is The Wine Writing World Out Of Touch?’ Touch THIS, Tree Boy…

Posted on January 10, 2013 by intoxreport

Whenever I am introduced to a black person, the first thing I say is, “What are you people calling yourselves these days?  Because I don’t want to say anything socially awkward.” But Seriously, Folks:  Like most semi-literate, semi-alert crackerhonkies, I … Continue reading →

Posted in GENERAL | Tagged , , | 12 Comments

MacLean Gets MacDirtier—The Column I Swore I Wouldn’t Write

Posted on January 8, 2013 by intoxreport

I’m the idea guy, dig?  You know my type—the egghead braniac that anal, sociopathic CEOs turn to in times of corporate crisis, trusting that I—and only I—will manage to find quick, creative, brilliant, (though generally expensive and impractical) solutions to … Continue reading →

Posted in GENERAL | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments

Wine Predictions, 2013: Part Two

Posted on December 31, 2012 by intoxreport

The following column needs to be taken seriously.  It was channeled via ‘psychography’, wherein the author falls into a trance-like state and is then possessed by some disembodied external force which composes a written prognostication without the subject’s conscious awareness.  … Continue reading →

Posted in GENERAL | 3 Comments

Wine Predictions, 2013: Remember, You Heard Them Here First

Posted on December 31, 2012 by intoxreport

Some things you may not know about me: My favorite color is SAE/ECE amber—one of the few technically approved colors for automotive signal lamps.  Also, I enjoy long, romantic strolls on the beach at sunset.  As well, there is nothing … Continue reading →

Posted in GENERAL | Tagged | 2 Comments

MacLean is MacDirty?? I Have Your Hack Back, Natalie!

Posted on December 23, 2012 by intoxreport

Over the past week, dutch-courage diva and distillate dominatrix Natalie MacLean has found herself in some professional hot water.  It began with the Palate Press’s tabloidesque rippage of her website’s use of unattributed wine reviews from other wine writers without … Continue reading →

Posted in GENERAL | Tagged , , , | 4 Comments

Another Column About Me. Oh, And ‘The Slow Wine Guide’

Posted on December 14, 2012 by intoxreport

Like so many of you, I like to pause during the final weeks of December and do some personal reflection with the aim of becoming a better parent, a better friend, a better American and a kinder, gentler anti-journalist in … Continue reading →

Posted in GENERAL | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Top Ten Holiday Wines For Under $10,000

Posted on December 10, 2012 by intoxreport

The other day I read an interesting statement made by my colleague Robert Whitley of Whitley on Wine. And, so we’re clear, by ‘colleague’ I mean ‘someone who writes about wine like me, but actually takes it seriously’.  Seriousity is … Continue reading →

Posted in GENERAL | Tagged , | 4 Comments