Monthly Archives: January 2015

Non-Stupid-Sounding Tasting Notes: The Final Frontier

Posted on January 31, 2015 by intoxreport

In a world filled with terrorist temper tantrums, approaching asteroids and diseases that make your eyeballs bleed, I spend an inordinate amount of time thinking about wine tasting notes. And here’s why: In theory, there exists a wine note format … Continue reading →

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Carmen Carmenère: Sixteen Bucks Of Brilliance

Posted on January 30, 2015 by intoxreport

I won’t tarry o’erlong on what the Chileans have done for Carmenère—roughly on par with what Blue Book Modeling Agency did for Norma Jeane Mortenson and Robert Johnson did for a beat-up six string. Enough to say that people who … Continue reading →

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Last Chance To Secure Seats At The ‘Writers Write; Everyone Else Attends Symposiums’ Symposium

Posted on January 27, 2015 by intoxreport

Seeking out small pockets of serious humor in a serious world preoccupied with ebola, ISIS and Tom Brady’s balls is a daunting task, but at the close of another nihilistic day, nothing is funnier than people who take themselves too … Continue reading →

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Rafael Alonso: Digging The Indigenous In Tierra de Léon

Posted on January 26, 2015 by intoxreport

America drinks more, Italy makes more and France sells more, but nobody grows more wine grapes than Spain. In fact, based on 2012 stats, about 15% of all the world’s acres planted to wine vines can be found in that … Continue reading →

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‘Garagista’ = Pretentious; ‘Garrigue’, Not

Posted on January 25, 2015 by intoxreport

When I taste wine, I tend to verbalize a lot.  I say things that may wind up in my tasting notes, but at the moment may sound like disjointed babble coming from a mentally-unhinged street person. And not just any … Continue reading →

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Experiment Proves Foie Gras Is Not Torture

Posted on January 20, 2015 by intoxreport

I fell in love with ‘method art’ when I first saw DeNiro play Jake LaMotta in Raging Bull.  As you recall, the Oscar-winner gained several hundred pounds to portray the boxer in his later years, eschewing the sort of pillow-with-straps … Continue reading →

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The Reign of Rhône; Long Live GSM

Posted on January 18, 2015 by intoxreport

With apologies to Tennyson, in Spring, a young man’s fancy may turn to thoughts of love, but in mid-January, we’re still pretty much in lockstep with the revelries of Southern Rhône. No wine I can bring to mind better says … Continue reading →

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As A Wine Critic, William Shatner Makes A Good Starship Captain

Posted on January 13, 2015 by intoxreport

I was recently introduced to William Shatner’s foray into what we can only hope is the corpulent old hambone’s final frontier: ‘Brown Bag’—a bizarre wine tasting show featuring people who don’t know anything about wine interacting with a host who … Continue reading →

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Corsica: Napoleon’s Vinous Dreamscape

Posted on January 12, 2015 by intoxreport

If you took the eno-expertise of France and blended it with the climate of the Italian Riviera and stirred in the heritage of Greece, you might  suppose that you’d just created vine Valhalla—a test tube appellation with Goldilocks conditions where … Continue reading →

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Je Suis Plein De Merde

Posted on January 10, 2015 by intoxreport

The tragedy at the Charlie Hebdo office in Paris has been fuel for reflection for a lot of people who write smarmy shit for a living.  It’s also proven useful First Amendment fodder for people who would never consider mocking … Continue reading →

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