Tag Archives: Robert Parker Jr.

Robert Parker Wants Make-Up Sex, That’s All

Posted on July 5, 2015 by intoxreport

It’s a mixed-up, jumbled-up, webbed-up world, kids, and what you just read is known as ‘clickbait’—a provocative headline designed to generate reader hits. And you bit, suckers. First, let me apologize for baiting your click then calling you suckers: “I … Continue reading →

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White Chicks Are Hotter Than Black Chicks

Posted on September 25, 2014 by intoxreport

Or is it the other way around?  I really don’t care; I am just trying to get your attention, fill column inches, make deadlines and stir up a little bad blood, because you know what?  I’m a bad blood stirrer-upper. … Continue reading →

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How To Write About Wine Like Robert Parker Jr.

Posted on March 3, 2012 by intoxreport

What’s the dillio with all the RPJ slaggin’, yo? He’s never called women sluts like Rush Limbaugh; he’s never referred to black people as ‘little monkeys’ like Howard Cosell and (as far as I know) he’s never publicly announced a … Continue reading →

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Mr. Natural Wine Sez: ‘YOU’RE The Right Tool For The Job, You Tool’

Posted on January 31, 2012 by intoxreport

Unlike most wine columnists, I never get ‘writer’s block’.  Au contraire, I deny that the phenomenon—whereby people who can’t think of anything to say go ahead and say it anyway—even exists. Oh, sure, sometimes our personal muses get all PMSsy, … Continue reading →

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Care And Feeding Of Your New Pet Peeve—Today’s Lesson: Booze

Posted on January 9, 2012 by intoxreport

So, you woke up Christmas morning so excited that you soiled your jammies!  You ran out to check beneath the tree and found that Santa had left you a brand-new, snuggly-huggly, squeezable-pleasable Pet Peeve!  Good on ya, Junior!  But don’t … Continue reading →

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